I haven’t been able to make progress on anything I’ve discussed in my previous posts.
The main reason? For the last 30 days, I have been almost entirely focused on moving my family to a new house. This also involves fixing up the old house to put it up for sale.
In summary: I am 90% focused on the move and only 10% focused on creating the business that will allow me to become a millionaire.
Because of this lack of focus, tasks that should be quick are dragging on forever. For example, surveying people to clarify if my project solves a real problem—identifying if there is a real “pain” that needs to be resolved—should have taken no more than a week. Instead, it has taken me more than a month.
Even though I have my Daily Affirmation ready, my goal defined, and other things prepared to start working, I haven’t been able to execute anything. I simply don’t have the time, and it looks like it will be this way for at least another month.
When distraction leads to a lack of progress
This situation has made me realize how critical it is to stay focused on the goal. And “focus” isn’t just about having time; it’s about not having worries that break your concentration.
Here is a perfect example.
During the packing process, a specific box went missing. It was the box containing our passports and other important documents. It didn’t appear anywhere.
This kept me worried for two full days until it finally appeared, hidden away in a corner.
But the issue isn’t that it was lost. The issue is that during those two days, there was no way for me to stop thinking about it.
My brain was in a loop: “Did I leave the box in the other house?” “Did I throw the box in the trash by mistake?” “Did someone steal it during the trip?” “Did I put the passports somewhere else and forget?” “If so, how do I find them now?” “How will I know if they are just lost or actually stolen?”
No matter how hard I tried, my brain refused to concentrate on anything else.
The $30,000 Lesson from 2008
This mental loop reminded me of an event during the financial crisis of 2008. My daughter was about 3 years old at the time. The entire financial sector and housing market were collapsing.
I had put down a down payment to buy an apartment. I had gone into debt just to pay that down payment. But a few months before closing the deal, the crisis hit.
When the date came to buy, no bank was giving loans to buy apartments in condo buildings; they were only lending for houses. The real estate developer told me: “If you don’t close by Date XX, we will enforce the clause and keep your down payment.”
I tried to make them listen to reason. I told them to rent the unit while the crisis passed. The answer was always negative.
Just like with the lost passports, my brain couldn’t concentrate on anything other than the amount of money I was going to lose.
I was in a state of deep gloom. Then, my 3-year-old daughter approached me and asked, “What’s wrong, Daddy? Why are you sad?”
Suddenly, I realized that my worry wasn’t just affecting me; it was affecting my loved ones.
In that instant, I decided to accept the situation and lose the money. The thought that “liberated” me was something like: “Okay, I can’t let these @#%^& people affect me and my family. Go to hell and keep the money.”
By the next day, I had no worries. I was a normal person again. I don’t know exactly how the brain works, but that solved it—thanks to the “help” of my 3-year-old daughter. It was that “acceptance” of the situation that made it possible for me to move forward.
Accepting the Sunk Costs
Something similar happens to me regarding things I didn’t do, or things I did do, or things done to me in the past. There is no way to turn back time. One must try to accept the issue and realize there is nothing anyone can do to change it. We have to force ourselves to think about the good things that have happened and realize the bad things are the minority.
The problem is, the human brain is wired to focus on the negative, not the positive.
For a long time, I blamed my dad for the fact that I don’t like selling (as I discussed in more detail in “The Comfort Zone Trap“). My thought was: “It’s my dad’s fault I’m screwed up and hate selling. He messed me up.” I saw it as a defined issue that couldn’t be changed.
But now, studying financially successful people, I realize they all had to do things they didn’t like, often with great sacrifice, during the early steps of their ventures. Everyone struggles at the beginning. Everyone must do things, whether they like them or not, if they want to be economically successful.
(This connects to another piece of advice I read while trying to decide which business to start: Start with something in a field you know. If you are a painter, do something related to painting. If you are a nurse, do something related to health. It makes sense because it removes friction).
How Millionaires Handle Negative Thoughts
Returning to the topic of negative thoughts from the past distracting us: Real millionaires (those who made it, not those who inherited it) manage to keep those negative thoughts under control.
All of them, without exception, mention examples of bad business deals, bad decisions, or bad past experiences.
But when asked about the loss they had here or there, they say: “Yes, I lost a lot here or there, but I also gained a lot here and there. The important thing is that, adding it all up, I have moved forward.”
I remember reading about one in my country’s newspaper. He spent a fortune buying a bank in Spain, but a few months later, the authorities closed the bank due to insolvency. Others mention regretting past excesses with drugs or superfluous spending. Others mention businesses they didn’t start because they listened to naysayers, only to do it anyway years later (when it was no longer new), costing them 100 times more to start. Others mention past traumas with parents, and more.
But they all end up “accepting” the loss and moving forward.
Obviously, it’s not something they overcome 100%—they still mention it and remember it. It affected them. But it doesn’t distract them. They accepted the situation and continued their quest for financial success. Even after losing everything, they stand up and start a new business.
I have at least 5 financial things I regret not doing (or doing) that haunt me constantly. Even though I try to follow the formula of “simply accepting the fact,” it isn’t easy. I know it passed. I know there is no benefit in worrying. But I must try not to let those past issues distract or demotivate me.
The Power of Spaced Study
Anyway, this move has kept me out of focus, which makes me forget much of what I’ve learned. This reminds me that one must constantly review what has been studied.
I am going to re-read again all my own posts to get back on track with the goal of becoming a millionaire.
I’ve noticed that when I read a book for the 2nd time, I discover new things. The same happens the 3rd time. Experts say:
First reading: To get the general idea.
Second reading: To understand the content in depth.
Third reading: To assimilate it and apply it to oneself.
But these readings shouldn’t be back-to-back the same day. Studies on the “Forgetting Curve” indicate that one hour after reading something, about 50% is forgotten. By the next day, that value rises to more than 70% forgotten.
That is why experts recommend doing a first review the next day, a second review three days later, and a third review a week later to fix it in long-term memory.
I will do exactly that with my posts, and I recommend you do the same to keep the knowledge fresh.
A Proof of Concept for "Affirmations"
Even though this move and the house repairs have kept me distracted, I haven’t stopped studying successful people. While I do manual labor on the house, I listen to audio-books.
This has kept me, at the very least, focused on the meta-goal.
And this led me to an important realization…. (read until the end)
Many authors mention that they kept constantly repeating that they would achieve this or that when they started their quest.
In my case, by continuing to study and staying open to these teachings, I feel more clarity and I feel more capable of achieving my objective. It certainly won’t be immediate (they all speak of years, which keeps my expectations grounded), but as they said, if I believe in my product and consider it a “benefit to humanity,” I won’t quit.
Here is the connection:
Because I have kept listening to these authors, I feel a shift in my mood and thinking compared to 3 months ago. This makes me think that repeating a Daily Affirmation, which is what they recommend, really can cause changes in one’s attitude.
This aligns with what is mentioned in the book Think and Grow Rich, where they say that this repetition is a form of autosuggestion which indirectly provokes the internal changes necessary to achieve the goal
The fact that simply listening to these people (for months now) changed my mindset is proof that autosuggestion works.
However, I haven’t started using and repeating the specific phrase I created (read “Creating My Daily Affirmation” for details) yet. I know I am not doing anything on the business right now due to the move, and I don’t want to start by telling myself something that I know is a lie from the beginning.
So, as soon as the move is finished, I will start constantly repeating my daily affirmation. Perhaps I will add some wording to prevent my past negative thoughts from distracting me and keep me focused.
I now have the proof that this tool works, and the logic behind it finally makes sense
